Another reason I'm a bad dad.

Good lord, I’ve turned into one of THOSE fathers. I’m having a hard time understanding and dealing with my oldest boy, Boopie. I keep trying to get him interested or letting him experience things that I enjoy, but he’s so apathetic I can’t tell if he likes something or not. Last year I took him to the Green Bay Packer vs. Jacksonville Jaguars game in Lambeau field. All he did was complain the whole time, he never smiled, and he never enjoyed a moment of it. He says he likes football and that he wanted to watch the game, but he never once seemed excited about the fact he was going. When I was a kid, my father took me to a Cubs/Cardinals baseball game. I hate baseball, but I was excited to go to a professional baseball game. It was fun and I enjoyed it.

Boopie says he wants to go to the re-enactments. So we make arrangements with his birth father so we can take him. When we get to it, he tends to complain about being there. I’ve tried various things to get him interested. I’ve tried teaching him tomahawk throwing, I even bought him his own. I told him when he gets older I’ll buy him a sword, that seems to bring a little smile to him. This last weekend I was sizing him for a rifle. I have a line on used child’s black powder rifle that I am thinking about buying him. At his age, I would have killed to have my father taking me out to get a black powder rifle for me to shoot. Boopie didn’t seem to care.

I know I am trying to put onto him things that interest me and that I like or liked as a kid. I also realize we are not the same person, but he does not seem to like anything except video games. I never had a lot of interest in them. He also loves cartoons. All he watches is cartoons. I had cable installed in his bedroom as part of a Christmas gift; all he watches is the Cartoon Network. I hate most cartoons. Other then the Simpsons and The Family Guy, I don’t watch them. I know, he’s at that age, but I was always running around with my friends at his age. I had a video game system; I just never played with it.

Why am I explaining all of this to you? His 12th birthday is coming up in just over a week and I’m still working on gifts for him. Whenever we ask him what he wants he doesn’t really give us a list. This isn’t just for his birthday either; he’s been doing that for Christmas as well. In fact, a couple of years ago, we asked him to go make a Christmas list and he said he wanted a new window for his bedroom (we were getting new windows put into the house at the time), underwear and pants. He didn’t ask for toys or anything like that.

When I was a kid, I would list all the toys that even remotely looked cool. I knew I wouldn’t get most of them, but I didn’t want to miss out on anything. I never once put down pants, underwear nor a window. I’ve tried fishing for idea’s and I’m getting nowhere. I even asked him about the new PSPs when they first came out, to see if he was interested in them. I got nothing. He didn’t seem to care or not. I’m at my wits ends. I’m tempted to get him nothing since I’ve gotten no communication of what he wants.

I don’t know, maybe I’ll just give him some pants, underwear and a window. I don’t know what else to do.

Am I the only one with this problem? Does anyone have any ideas or suggestions as to what I can do? I don’t want to be one of those fathers that pushes what he likes onto his kids, but I just don’t know what else to do anymore.